This is the video blog from Thursday, February 26, 2016. I talk about there difference between discipline and punishment.
Order my book on Amazon.Com
Yesterday I released my second book on Amazon Kindle. The title is Success and Mindset Secrets for Love, Happiness, and Abundance. This book is a collection of blog posts that I began writing back in 2011 that are now unpublished.
In the book I talk about several things including:
The book retails for only 99 cents on exclusively on Kindle and is available for as a FREE download until October 10th.
Go and get your copy TODAY!
Do other people make you angry? Do they always seem to dump on your ideas, your goals, your dreams, your aspirations? Do you find yourself in conflict with people, even sometimes those you love, over trivial things that you would like to do, have, be, or experience? Does it seem that no matter how hard you try, you can’t seem to make any progress. If so, you may be under the influence of these five lies.
#1 You Need Someone Else’s Permission To Be Happy
In our culture we have this idea, this altruistic concept, that we need someone else’s permission before we can be happy. We think that we must reach some personal development milestone, or by some twisted altruistic logic, we must wait for someone else to be happy with us before we can be happy with ourselves. But the truth is we don’t. We can choose to be happy with ourselves and our life, despite someone else withholding their “permission” to do so.
That’s not to say that you run roughshod over other people and don’t take their feelings into consideration, but when something is really important to you, when you’ve invested hours into learning a new skill or developing a plan to achieve some goal, you have every right to pursue it, whether others want you to or not. As long as that goal or objective is not hurtful or destructive, like say, cheating on your spouse, or maxing out the family credit cards to buy a home theater system, then you have every right to pursue your goals and dreams and BE happy.
#2 You Need Permission From “The Grown Ups”.
Like #1 you don’t need permission from the “grown ups”. Why? Because, if you’re an adult, you ARE the grown up. When you were a child the grown ups made all the decisions for you; what you eat, what you were allowed to wear, whether or not your could borrow the car and have $20 to fill the tank and go to a movie with your friends. (I was in high school in the late 1980’s, folks).
You see, you needed the permission from the grown ups when you were younger because that’s what grown ups do. They dole out permission as a privilege. If you did things right; you cleaned your room, you got good grades, you didn’t beat up your younger sibling, you got to do the things you wanted to do (to some extent). But when you get out into the “real world”, nobody ever told you that you don’t have to ask for permission to live your life any more.
#3 You Have To Take Other People’s Negativity Into Yourself
There are people who are generally positive and optimistic, and people who are generally negative and pessimistic. Contrary to popular belief, you don’t have to let other people’s negativity run around inside your own mind. Even other people’s negative opinions of you are not your responsibility and you don’t have to believe them.
Gandhi said “I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet.” Think about that for a second. And think about how I’ve phrased this particular lie. You see when someone else dumps their negativity onto you they are, in effect, dumping it INTO you. They are trying to put it into your mind.
I think of this as a virus. Someone else is infected by this overwhelming negative energy. They don’t like you, they don’t respect you, they don’t think you’re capable of making a sound decision, and so on. So they take all of their negative concepts about who you are and they try infect you with it. The really insidious part of that is that they often think they are doing it for your own good. But they’re not. They’re doing it for THEIR own good. They do it because they believe that they will somehow benefit from you adopting their perspective of who you are.
#4 Negative, Disempowering, or Controlling People Are Your Enemy
Despite the fact that negative, disempowering, and controlling people will try to infect you with their mind virus, that doesn’t make them your enemy. They are NOT the reason that you are not living the life of your dreams. Once you make them your enemy every interaction that begins with a misalignment turns into an all out war. We make it OK to hate our enemies and because they are our enemies, it’s OK for us to conquer them.
But even though these people are in your life, it doesn’t mean that they are your enemy. If they are in your life it is for a reason and, even though your don’t have to take their negative energy into yourself, and make it part of yourself, you might listen with a discerning ear and see if you can determine the real message behind the message.
#5 Someone Else Is Responsible For Your Life Experiences
In the end, there is only one person responsible for you life experiences… YOU!
What you decide is what you will experience. If you’re in a relationship and you experience nothing but pain, then you have decided that the relationship, or the other person is the source of that pain, and so you seek to separate yourself from that source, so as to avoid the pain.
Obviously I’m not talking about physical or psychological abusive situations. That’s just dangerous. But I’m talking about the every day, experiences of life. Yes, other people influence that and yes, it can be challenging to let other people’s energy flow around you and not affect you, but ultimately YOU are the person who gives everything its meaning.
Nothing means anything until you give it a meaning, which means you are responsible for it.
There have been a TON of ALS Ice. Bucket Challenges going around the internet the last couple of weeks. So many that some people are starting to complain about them and even publishing internet legends about people who have died doing the challenge.
But even with the bad publicity raised by a few people and the false stories of people dying, the reality is that ALS is a very rare, and very real disease that affects thousands of people every year.
So when my friend, Matt Edwards, the drummer in my band, Requiem, challenged me, I gladly accepted.
Now… On to the gratuitous Gary getting covered in ice water video….